I knew something was very wrong when he stumbled crazily back to bed.
Jeff had gotten up to take his shower, like he does every work day. But instead of next hearing him shave and brush his teeth, I heard the bathroom door open back up. And watched him sway.
“I feel so dizzy!” he said. Abnormally so. And it wasn’t going away. He felt nauseous. Sweaty.
With no sense of balance, the whole room was spinning uncontrollably in his head, even though there was no movement at all in reality.
I’ve felt like that lately, too, in my soul. Like a big part of my world is spinning uncontrollably around me, even though on the outside, there appears to be no motion at all. My vision is limited and my nerves are super-sensitive. I feel off-balance and wobbly.
But like Jeff, I have to remember that my spiritual dizziness is not reality either. When I get still (Psalm 46:10) and look straight ahead, the whirling motion stops.
Focus on Jesus, I preach to myself. Not on the outer edges.
By staying centered on him (Matthew 6:33), I bypass the blur.
It’s not a self-help strategy. It’s gospel truth (Colossians 1:22-23). By looking to the Lord, I can stand firm. I find balance.
Jeff was later diagnosed with damage to the inner ear caused by a virus. He’s since made an almost full recovery, praise God.
I’m recovering, too. Spiritual vertigo can be corrected by a change of perspective. Trading my vision for God’s. He sees the big picture.
And when I lean into him, he’s got me. He can keep me from stumbling (Jude 1:24-25).
* * *
I’m still learning the lesson of “one thing at a time” for Lent.
When you feel life is spinning out of control, do you have a favorite scripture or truth you turn to?