Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden,
and I will give you rest.
Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me,
for I am gentle and lowly in heart,
and you will find rest for your souls.
Matthew 11:28-29
And I’m scared.
Not about her marriage. We already love Fuller. But about planning a wedding. Now is no time for rest!
Or is it?
Didn’t Christ call us to rest, no matter what’s going on around us?
I don’t always get it. I know it’s not a call to cease activity (which is how *I* define rest!).
So how do we rest, even in the middle of wedding (and let’s not forget graduation) plans and all the other work we’re called to do?
1. Seek out a friend
Don’t work alone. Christ says come to him. How do I do that? It’s about trust. The more mindful I am of his presence with me, the more my mind is at peace.
When it comes to wedding plans, I wouldn’t dream of doing it alone. I’ll need all the help I can get. I hope to find rest in community.
2. Do it right the first time
It’s easier to do things right the first time than have to go back and correct wrongs. Even though Christ’s ways sometimes seem like the long way around, they are the most useful, loving, and best ways.
His yoke is much lighter in the long run than the sinful one we want to hurriedly put on for our pleasure.
3. Keep a humble heart
Don’t be a know-it-all. It’ll just make your work harder. Be willing to learn from others. I’ll definitely be asking advice from my sister-in-laws and friends who have already had daughters get married.
Jesus was the ultimate example of humility. Even though he was God himself, he still listened to his father and did what he said.
4. Breathe deeply
Take in refreshment during the work. I look forward to the extra time I’ll get to spend with Morgan as we make plans for her big day as well as for the far more important days afterwards. I want these to be meaningful and God-glorifying times.
Our work with Christ is desired to satisfy our thirst. Forever (John 4:14). If we work in him and through him and for him, we will find rest for our souls. That’s what I’m counting on.
* * *
Please share your advice on how to be at rest while planning a wedding. :-)
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17 comments:
Congratulations to Morgan and Fuller! This is one of the most exciting times ever, Lisa. I'm so excited for you as you work with your daughter.
You are certainly on the right track when it comes to how to do things...those four ways to rest! Don't you just love His ways?
The days after that day are far more important... yeah, you've got the right perspective! Can I watch you from here on to learn how to be a good mother-in-law? :)
I like the #1 especially. I, too, need all the help I can get!
Congrats! How exciting. Sounds like you got it under control!
In our house we subscribe to the wisdom of James Gurney's Dinotopia: "Breathe deep. Seek peace." Sometimes dinosaurs know best.
Congratulations to your daughter and future son-in-law!
Having all sons, I haven't had the experience planning any weddings but my own, although I did hear a good bit about my son and daughter-in-law's. Definitely using the wisdom of others is a big help. There weren't wedding planners in my day, at least not for us common folk. :-) But they're pretty common now and the one my daughter-in-law had was a jewel.
One of the hardest things to rest about is the opinions of others -- especially when they're family and those opinions clash. There needs to be some flexibility and willingness to listen to others (a bride in our former church had an outdoor wedding on a very very hot summer day. The wedding coordinator fainted during the reception and my youngest son got violently ill on the way home -- he had played outside most of the time in the heat -- we thought he was ok but wasn't. Yet the bride was upset that some of the elderly people watched the proceedings from the window of the building nearby to get put of the heat. That's going a little too far in the "I'm going to have it my way no matter what" department, in my opinion.) Yet somehow weddings bring out a lot of opinions from a number of people, and you can't please everyone. Determining ahead of time what things to stand firm on and what things are flexible and making the determination to handle differences of opinion with grace rather than irritation helps -- but can only be done with Christ's strength!!
Forgive me -- I seem to get very wordy when commenting on your posts. :-)
Our oldest son is getting married this summer, and I imagine there will come a time when it will seem like no rest. But it's time to make a point of doing so.
Thanks for sharing!
Congratulations! Fun times are waiting ahead. We had three kids marry in three consecutive years. Exhausting, but fun.
oh, how exciting, friend! congratulations! i love your suggestions for rest... i would really encourage you to take time to 'date' your daughter during the planning process; to take her for coffee and just spend these last few months cherishing her... i wish i'd done that with my mum before mine. xo
Congratulations to your daughter and her fiance! How exciting for all of you. I've never planned a wedding but the ones I've been part of that were fun and not so stressful were ones with spelled out expectations for everyone involved.
Yaay for Morgan and Fuller!! I'm so excited! Feel free to call me if you need anything with the wedding planning... It can be a lot. I know it's going to be beautiful :) Try to be patient with her... It can be stressful trying to plan a wedding! Congratulations. I can't wait to get to know Fuller better.
Congratulations to Morgan and Fuller, you and your husband and the rest of the family! Rest and work can go hand in hand - I find your four ways to rest in work very helpful.
Grateful for your words of wisdom, Lisa.
Oh, Congratulations! Our eldest son is getting married in 2 weeks! Very exciting. Oddly enough, I am getting rest. They're seeing to it :D Let you know how it all turns out :D Have a great weekend!
Just getting caught up on some of my reading--congratulations! How exciting! My daughter just got married in January and, trust me, it doesn't have to make you crazy. You are wise to enlist the help of a friend along the way. I borrowed all the files from a friend whose daughter had gotten married a few months earlier. My motto--if you're not having fun, you're not doing it right! I have such beautiful memories of time spent with my daughter shopping for her wedding dress and just daydreaming together. Savor the moments. There is true beauty and rest in them.
I am encouraged after reading all your comments that it IS possible to enjoy the journey to the wedding. I certainly will try to follow your good advice!
Hi Lisa! Thanks for keeping the light on for me. :) First, congratulations! Now, you have a reason to gift all the wise and amazing insights you have on life, marriage and faith. No wonder you've been so reflective. LOL.
My advice, not as a mom, but from a bride's point of view: fewer options means easier decision making. I looked at "3" of everything an chose form there. 3 cake places, 3 bridal stores, ... etc. Planning a wedding doesn't have to be stressful. Mine wasn't. Key was accepting not everyone was going to be happy. The most important is bride & groom. It's their day!
They're married!!! I just had to stop by and share it with you. Have a blessed week, Lisa :D
Congratulations, Jeri! So glad you let me know. I’m glad you were able to actually ENJOY the process. Very encouraging. My prayers are with your son and new daughter-in-law! Can’t wait to see pictures soon.
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