This was lesson 1.
My 15-yr-old and I were watching The Blind Side. When Sandra Bullock 
“You remember?” I asked her. She didn’t.
And then she made a comment that crushed my spirit. “I don’t remember you reading to me at all when I was little.”
What?
I stopped the movie. How many thousands, yes, literally thousands, of books did I read to this child from the time she was an infant? And she remembered none of them?
How many books have you read to your children?
How many will they remember?
Does it matter?
Granted, she remembered the more current read-alouds, but seemingly lost were all those picture books and pop-up books and easy-readers and Winnie-the-Pooh and Curious George (although his antics always made her uncomfortable). 
Does her failure to remember mean that I wasted my time reading to her as a little girl?
Certainly not! Whether she consciously recalls the memories or not, they’re embedded in her. It was time well-spent: bonding, loving, enjoying.
I have no regrets for hours reading together, even though they’re unremembered by her.
That was lesson 1.
* * *
This is lesson 2. It’s harder.
Today I’ll dress up, as planned, and attend the Mother’s Day Tea at my mom’s assisted living. I’ve been telling her for a week that I’m coming.
But when I knock on her door this afternoon, and say, “Hey, Mama! It’s Lisa,” she’ll be shocked to see me!
Because that’s her reaction every time I visit. Because she forgets that I was there…just yesterday. And two days prior to that.
And tomorrow, she’ll forget that I came today.
Does that mean that today doesn’t matter?
I like to look forward to things.
Plan and schedule and anticipate.
And I like to look back on things.
Awaken and remember and smile.
If I can’t look forward to it,
and I can’t look back on it,
does that make it any less important?
It’s a very difficult lesson I’m trying to learn—that what I do today has value in it, regardless of the past or future. Regardless that it couldn’t be anticipated earlier and won’t be remembered later.
Whether my mom consciously recalls my visits or not, I pray that the feeling of being loved is embedded in her.
Even if the specific memory is quickly forgotten?
Yes, even if the specific memory is quickly forgotten.
God loved me far back before I could remember. So I can love now even when memory is gone.
Have no regrets for hours loving now. Don’t look forward to see if they’ll be remembered later.
Love requires no planner nor scrapbook. They’re nice, but…
Now is enough. Now matters. Now is the time to love.
Today counts.
* * *
What are you doing today
that no one will remember tomorrow?
Does that matter?
More Walks with Him
11 comments:
Oh Lisa, what a very powerful post the Holy Spirit has penned through you today. I SO needed reminded of that today. LOVE...that is what matters, not whether the day is or not...it is LOVE that counts...Love NEVER fails...Love ALWAYS endures! Thank you, sweet Sister.
Wonderful, powerful thought. We just need to love now.
That was a beautiful post! I may save it in my "I may want to read this again later" folder. :-) One time when my dad and I were leaving the nursing home after visiting my grandmother with Alzheimers... there was a very elderly couple sitting on a bench near the back door. He had his arm around her and she had her head on his shoulder. The wife was a resident and the husband came every day, though she never remembered from day to day and some days didn't even know who he was. I remember my dad remarked, "You want to know what love looks like? There it is". Since my dad didn't say things like that much, it has stuck with me all these years. My point? You never know who else you are blessing with your actions, either.
Thank you, Lisa for blessing me today...with your comment on my blog and I'm so glad I came here to glean insight from your incredible blog.
I asked my older daughters if they remembered me reading to them and they said they remember reading to me...not me to them. :)
But you are right...it does matter, even if it was just those warm cuddly close moments...aren't we glad we had them.
Thank you for making me smile today... :)
Tremendous lesson. Every moment is importnat. I am so trying to grasp this and live it in my day to day.
Ouch. Those are tough lessons. I guess you're right, though. Today does matter. Whether or not the one we are loving on remembers what we gave, God knows. He's keeping track of every loving act done for Him.
Beautiful as always!
Wow. Those are really beautiful thoughts. "What I do today has value in it" and "Have no regrets for hours loving now." I think those are two very valuable ideals missing from my own life. Too busy planning just to enjoy today...just to love today.
wow. those are some really deep thoughts. Thanks for reading to me even when I don't remember it.
I love you, Mommy!
<3
Lisa,
Wow. I just happened to enter your blog for the first time today. And I can only say...I am deeply touched and blessed by your article. Yes, at times we want our past to be remembered vividly and clearly in our today...but at times it is not possible. This is a sobering reminder that yes...NOW is more important than yesterday...or the tomorrow we are hoping to get to. Thank you and God bless!
Gladwell
May we learn to live today with all love and might, knowing that tomorrow will not come.
May I not forget that TODAY I am on my way to Heaven.
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